


Upgrade

by orphan_account



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, But she also wants to tear off his clothes, Depression, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, God Complex, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Insanity, One-Sided Attraction, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romeo is a poor smol bean, Self-Harm, Smoking, Suicidal Ideation, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Xara wants to rip Romeo's skull out, protect him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 16:51:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15953525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "I'm sure I'll be fine" his tone was unreadable.And so she found herself back in bed, and only when she re awoke at 9am did she realize she left him alone with the knife.





	1. Chapter 1

Amy looked down apon the half-destroyed town of BeaconCity, expression sombre. This week had been the most stressful thing to ever happen to any of them, and her nerves were shot. She gave up fighting off the shaking and just sat on the thin ledge atop the building.

"Can i sit here?"

She blinked and turned, and there was Romeo, looking scared. Scared of her? She was a skinny 15 year old, did he think she could hurt him? Then again, maybe he just thought she would scream or cry or something.

She didn't. 

She nodded.

He nodded back hesitantly and sat next to her, and they both sat in silence for a little while, wind blowing hair into her face. She pulled it back into a small ponytail before sighing and looking at him. "What are you doing to do now?" she asked curiously. "Jesse won't let anyone hurt you, but he can't always be by your side. The moment you try and step out there they'll kill you"

The ex-admin laughed without humour, blue eyes still strange to look at when she had been used to the bright crimson and gold. "That's why I'm up here" he said quietly. "I'm not going down there. Even if i deserve it. Just... Not yet"

"Yeah, i get it" she sighed and leant back, kicking her legs and ignoring how sharp stings of pain shot through her body. "Don't jump though"

Romeo gave a real laugh this time, if a bit bitter. "I won't."

They stayed there until the sun was setting, and finally Amy stood up. Romeo blinked, having been caught up in the moment, and slowly ascended too. She nodded at him and they climbed down. Most were busy finishing up primary repairs or were going inside to sleep to notice the redhead among the streets, so Romeo evaded having his head sliced off.

For today, at least.

They reached the hall that Jesse lived above, and Amy rapped on the door her usual rhythm. 

The brunette opened the door looking tired, though he immediately snapped to awareness when he saw Romeo. "We thought you ran away! Where were you??"

The redhead flushed and rubbed the back of his head, and Amy snorted. "Sitting on a ledge with me, admiring the sun of course!"

Jesse sputtered before groaning. "Sitti- you two- ledge- i-..... Ugh. Ok" he stepped back. "Wanna come in, then? It's getting late"

Amy stepped inside and Romeo turned to walk away, causing Jesse to raise an eyebrow in confusion. "Uhhh, you're not coming in? Where are you gonna go?"

He startled, bewildered. "Wh- you were inviting me in as well?"

Jesse blinked. "Yes? Where did you think you would sleep?"

Romeo looked embarrassed. "On... On the street? Or in a tree?"

Jesse blinked a few more times before slumping in exasperation and pulling him in by his shirt. "Romeo. Dude. You can sleep here. So like... Come do that"

"I-i, Uhhh.." Romeo stammered before yelping as the brunette dragged him upstairs. Amy muffled a laugh. Jesse was amazing when tired.


	2. Flashes

Amy didn't sleep.

She kept getting creepy flashes she hoped weren't some form of twisted premonition. Splashes of blood, Romeo in a white void with open cuts on his wrists, Jesse with two-tonal eyes screami-

She cut off the memory there. She didn't want to remember what she had seen. It had been borderline traumatising.

She swung her legs over the bed and ignored the clock speaking '5am', stepping into the kitchen.

She froze when she saw Romeo holding a knife with a blank look on his face.

"R-romeo?" she said quietly, as if being loud would break him.

He jumped and dropped the knife, it clattering as it hit the tile floor. He turned to her with a look of panic he quickly smoothed over. "O-oh, good morning. Sorry I'm up, i couldn't sleep. Did i wake you?"

"N-no.." Amy mumbled, eyes locked onto the knife warily. "What were you doing?"

"Ah, i was going to make myself some fruit but i got lost in thought" he replied, and though that sounded true, his voice shook to imply he was leaving information out.

"Alright.." she said quietly before sitting down at the kitchen table. "Well you're not alone on the 'can't sleep' bit"

"You can't either? Why-?" he froze before looking away with a look of regret. "Oh, right. I'm.. I'm sorry, if that's worth anything"

"No, not you! Well, not entirely.." she trailed off, and blinked as he sat across from her. "Want to talk about it?" he asked, subdued. Amy blinked. "You a therapist now?" he chuckled. "No, just... Asking"

She shrugged and lowered her head into her folded arms on the table. "I dunno. I keep getting these little flashes of these awful things, and i - i hope it's not of the future. They're... Horrible?"

"How so?" he asked curiously, raising a brow. She swallowed.

"Sometimes i hallucinate blood on the walls. And not just drops, splashes..." she shuddered, whispering the last word like it was blasphemy. "Sometimes I'll see Jesse or... Stella, i think her name is? But they have your eyes. Yknow, the red ones?" she gestured. He nodded.

"And... I see lots of you. I don't know where you are, it's... This white empty space. But you're usually tired and you usually have... Cuts on your arm. Like you've been tortured? It's disturbing" Amy breathed before closing her eyes as if that would block the memories.

"Yeah, that's messed up. I'm sorry that's happening, you should... Probably tell Jesse" Romeo said, and Amy took a moment to process.

He didn't seem shocked, or scared, or disturbed.

Just concerned.

For her.

"You... You don't think it's weird i imagine you all broken down?" she asked, tone filled with confusion. "If these visions are real, you-"

"I'm sure I'll be fine" his tone was unreadable.

And so she found herself back in bed, and only when she re awoke at 9am did she realize she left him alone with the knife.

\---

As she sort of expected, Romeo had long sleeves that later morning. A grey button up, so probably a spare of Jesse's. He was holding down the cuffs.

She said nothing.

She did keep her eye on Jesse though.

She ended up walking up to him, and asked the question burning on her mind ever since her freaky premonitions.

"Hey Jesse, where is Stella right now? And do you think it's possible to transfer admin powers?" she asked in one breath.

He raised a brow. "Stella is helping to fix champion city-" Romeo winced slightly "-and i don't know abou-" he suddenly cut off, looking behind Amy. "Um, i would brace yourself-!"

"Wha-?!" Amy shrieked as a ball of pink jumped on her bodily, sending both her and her assailant to the floor.

Through the pain she noticed the greyish-navy skin.

Oh. Adelaide. 

"A-adds, get... Gettof.." she grumbled, familiar pink hair coverinf ber face.

"Aaaah, I'm sorry!" said girl chirped, jumping up and off her in one movement.

Amy peeled her face off of the floor with a grunt, eye twitching. She liked Addie, she DID, but the older girl tested her patience.

She looked over to see Romeo looking bleary and tired and wondered how the hell they were related.

Then again, that was an unfair comparison. Addie had been raised by admin Romeo, after all. And Admin R had been... Well, the god equivalent of ecstasy, at least from what she'd seen. Which had been rather little. She didn't consider this her fault - Jesse could get his big moment demodding the admin for all she cared, she was busy with Xara in the underneath.

Well. Maybe she wished she had been there. But it didn't matter. Too late now.

She shook her head, aware she had gotten lost in thought and her pseudo-girlfriend slash stalker was looking at her weirdly. She coughed and looked down. "It's fine. Just give me a warning next time?"

Addie nodded rapidly, beaming. "Sure, sure!! Anywayyyy- you look tired! Did you not sleep?"

Amy self consciously rubbed at the space below her eyes, which likely had massive bags now. She shrugged. "Eh. Lost in imagination i guess. I did sleep a bit. Just not much"

Romeo yawned at that moment, and the pinkette blinked. "You didn't sleep either?"

"Nah" he shrugged, looking unbothered. "Not used to it. Admin's don't sleep, remember?"

She frowned. "I sleep"

"You're half admin" he shot back. She pouted. 

"Yeah, and you would still be an admin if ya weren't so dumb" she said, before stepping to the cupboard to pull out a bowl and spoon. Amy jumped as Lukas stepped in, looking to be the only one who actually slept well besides Addie. "What's up" he stretched. "Gonna have to get back to my cabin, but I'm fine to get some breakfast here?" he looked questioningly at Jesse, who smiled. "Go ahead, man"

The breakfast was... It wasn't awkward persay, but it did feel slightly off. Amy and Romeo were avoiding eye contact, Addie was just a ball of energy spitting out random topic starters that no one could keep up with, and Jesse and Lukas were the only ones really chatting with each other.

"So" Amy yawned as she dropped her bowl on the counter, ignoring Jesse's wince. "When you gonna talk to Xara?"

Romeo paused, entire body stilling, before continuing to stack the cutlery like he had never stopped. "Soon, probably". He was trying to sound detatched, but came off more depressed.

"Define 'soon'" she said flatly, unimpressed. "Soon as in 'this week?' orrrrr, soon as in 'this year'?"

He swallowed and gave an awkward little smile. "This week, then.. Eheh" he slumped. Jesse patted his shoulder, expression tinted with sympathy. "Peice of advice. The sooner you talk, the better. The longer you leave it the worse it'll get" he hummed, mind flashing to Petra. His cheeks involuntarily burned.

Amy just rolled her eyes, ignoring the flare of jealousy.

Romeo bit his lip but nodded. "Y-yeah. I should probably help fix the mess i caused here though, right?"

"Well yes" Amy frowned, rubbing her chin. "But if you go out like that you're gonna get dismembered, fam. Wanna borrow a jumper?"

Romeo raised a brow. "You're 15 and I'm physically 20 something. We're also different genders. I don't think your jumpers will fit me"

The light-brunette nodded slowly in acceptance before snapping her fingers. "Be right back, i know a cheap store that probably wasn't rekt!" she ran out the door before they could react.

Jesse chuckled and threw a pair of keys at Romeo. "I've gotta go out, so you wait here until she's back. Sorry, I'm sure we got something to keep you busy"

And with that, he left.

Romeo looked down at the keys in his hands and swallowed.

'You don't deserve this'


	3. Repairs and Destruction

Amy came back with a navy hoodie with white stripes running up the sleeves. It was plain and cheap, but was baggy on Romeo and shaded his face so it did its job.

She gave him a thumbs up as he left before thinking better and tailing him, a sly little smirk on her face. "So, ol' friendo Xara, did you two use to date? It's bothering me" she grinned, and delighted in him sputtering. 

He calmed and frowned at her. "Of course not"

She stuck her tongue out. "You seem awful indignant over something that didn't happen~!"

"Seriously, we didn't" he said grumpily. She smirked, unsure if she believed him.

"Whelp... Ready to go out and help rebuild?" she grinned at him, and he nodded and followed her out down the streets.

It seem that the more destruction they came across sent Romeo deeper into his self hatred, as ahe fully withdrew beneath the hood and stuff his hands in the pockets, and she could see him grit his teeth.

They finally found a salveagable mess that was clearly actively being worked on already, and Amy beckoned the older of the two to join her as she began to take wood and cobble from the chest nearby and rebuild, grunting as she balanced the stack she was now carrying. She wasn't deficit in strength by any means, but carrying logs was very different from fighting.

Romeo helped for a bit, keeping his head low and flinching away when someone looked at him for longer than a few moments. The others seemed to shrug it off as shyness, and Amy felt rather bad at how clearly terrified he was.

When the sun started to lower again and the rest slunk off into their homes, he apparently deemed it safe to flip back his hood, panting. She smiled slightly at how sweaty and exhausted he looked. Doing labour in a jumper with the hood up must have been torture.

Then a stone flew at him, and it was only with his reflexes he moved, and Amy swore she heard a dramatic 'whoosh' as it skimmed the side of his head. She winced as she saw it. It was big, about the size of her fist, and very sharp.

A boy glared at them, appearing to be in his later teenage years, and already scooping up another stone. "The fuck do you think YOU'RE doing here?" he snarled. "Can't believe Jesse let your wretched ass crawl it's way back into our town" he threw the rock and Romeo easily dodged it, frowning even with regret covering his features. "I'm already attempting to make up for what I've done" he said awkwardly. "Harming me won't solve anything and it won't change what I've already done"

"It'll make me feel better!" he snorted. "My sister lived in champion city. She's in a coma right now, because of that lightning you sent" his expression curled into something dark. "You're gonna fucking pay for that"

"Ooooookay, this is getting out of hand!" Amy managed out, face pale. "How abouts we head home?"

"How about you stay still and i might make it quicker" he snarled, and every drop of blood in her body froze as he pulled out an enchanted iron sword and leapt at Romeo.

Knowing he was unarmed she summoned her own enchanted diamond one and blocked it, her weaker upper body strength causing her deflection to stagger her. While she stumbled he slashed again, and she tried desperately to ignore the searing pain that rushed through her side as blood sprayed out. He took this moment to overhead swing at Romeo-

Blood flew into the air 

Amy sucked in a sharp breath

Romeo's hand tightened around the sword, even as a puddle formed on the floor beneath fron the obscene amount of blood leaking out. The boy looked shocked so the redhead kicked him in the stomach, sending him flying back. Amy took Romeo's uninjured hand and bolted.


	4. Recovery?

The pain was searing.

It was the worst thing she had ever experienced.

She clutched her side, eyes watering at the slash in her jumper, though she comforted herself by reminding herself that it could easily be sewn back up.

She was more concerned about Romeo.

They had practically collapsed in Jesse's home, who didn't seem to back yet, and Romeo kept flexing his fingers with a look of morbid fascination on his face. She bit her lip and tapped his shoulder. "Y-you okay, man?" she asked quietly. His eyes moved to her, but it was like he was looking right through her. "I..." he turned back to his hand. "...Didn't know i could bleed this much.."

THAT certainly made her start. She moved to tear her jumper but flinched and didn't, instead reaching under to rip her shirt and wrap his hand. He didn't even blink at the streaks of agony that must have been flooding his nervous system.

 

"What i said before..." he murmered, and she stilled. He looked broken in a way. "I told that guy that 'harming me won't solve anything'.." he made an odd choking noise and clenched his fist, the injured one. She undid his fingers and frowned. He chuckled bitterly. "This is exactly what i mean. I'm so ready to harm myself but i'm too scared to let others hurt me. It's... Pathetic" he shook his head. She noticed his fingers trace his wrist under his sleeve. She swallowed.

"I-i don't want to just leave without saying anything, but i really have no idea what to tell you.." she said awkwardly. "I've... I've never dealt with something like this."

He nodded easily. "You're just a teenager, i wasn't expecting you to therapy me".

She swallowed and prepped herself to reply when Jesse stepped into the house, looking confused and worried.

Amy realized she hadn't bandaged her wound yet and nodded to Romeo before leaving.

Romeo made a barely perceptible nod back, and the moment she rounded the corner that led to the stairs Amy staggered, clutching her wound.

This sucked.


End file.
